Soap Operas

Who tried to pull the freedom of speech card here lol?

Lol.. as usual I'm usually oblivious but one thing I know is typing and speech can be interpreted differently. Without us seeing each other, our messages may not come across as we intend it, hence I try to be more or less empathic and assume the best, not unless the other person was outright on the attack and vitriolic.


I find this hobby of ours very relaxing, very expensive but very relaxing. Did I mention brutally expensive? Yes.. and that too.


I'm proud that most of those that I came across in this hobby are real gents, it's an honor to be among that group. There are bad apples, but there are also misunderstood.. bananas? My point is, it's better to be nice and give the benefit of the doubt, we don't know if who we are talking to might be one of the nicest guys you could meet in real life or just going through something really difficult.


I agree, the drama is tiring. We face a lot of drama in real life, this hobby is a nice sweet escape.

not a bad idea with the addition of rule #5 to leave the drama at the door. we'll consider it.

believe it or not, we've had someone come over here, speak absolute nonsense in threads, and then complain when we had to tell him to knock if off in a PM. his rebuttal was to tell him the rule he broke and then try to chastise us for not being as 'libertarian' as we say we are. please, get out and don't come back.

not a bad idea with the addition of rule #5 to leave the drama at the door. we'll consider it.

believe it or not, we've had someone come over here, speak absolute nonsense in threads, and then complain when we had to tell him to knock if off in a PM. his rebuttal was to tell him the rule he broke and then try to chastise us for not being as 'libertarian' as we say we are. please, get out and don't come back.

What do you mean? I have freedom of speech!!!! (sarcasm)

not a bad idea with the addition of rule #5 to leave the drama at the door. we'll consider it.

believe it or not, we've had someone come over here, speak absolute nonsense in threads, and then complain when we had to tell him to knock if off in a PM. his rebuttal was to tell him the rule he broke and then try to chastise us for not being as 'libertarian' as we say we are. please, get out and don't come back.

What do you mean? I have freedom of speech!!!! (sarcasm)

That was basically it. We're very flexible here and forgiving, but we have boundaries and ethics too.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8IBnfkcrsM

If Rudyard Kipling's RULE OF THE BANDAR LOG works for you well and good. But when people bring ill tidings that reflect issues in the equally mythical SHAVING COMMUNITY waving the Marquess of Queensbury's rules while straightening one's university or regimental tie in umbrage and rebuttal is
no less histrionic.

Why all the drama? Soap Operas? (OK a Pun)

I think Brucie said it best. It's the nature of the beast. There is also a very great conflict of interest on a couple of the shaving forums. That is a surefire way to generate conflict and strife. Since many people are members of multiple forums, those two places pollute the rest of the ecosystem to some extent. If you think the wetshaving world is adversely impacted, go take a look at the fountain pen forums. Some good places, but one big, $$$$ oriented, acrimony-generating place too.

Why are arguments from other forums dragged into here?

While each forum is a separate entity, they are all part of a larger online wetshaving world. Commonality of membership to some degree means that they are never totally separate from one another.

What is the point of attacking vendors who you KNOW read this stuff?

Revenge? Boredom? Throwing a competitor under the bus? That the vendors read this stuff is likely one of the motivations.

I've seen a few people respectfully ask to have a venting section, where it is allowable to vent frustrations over other forums, but to me, that is very counter-productive. If you are here, at DFS, be here. Let the other forums go about their business, and leave the drama there. Rehashing it ad nauseum here, on this forum, does nothing to change the other forums, and does nothing to alleviate any negativity an individual might be feeling.

When people are poked with a sharp stick, they will holler "Ouch!". If they are prevented from doing so on the offending forum, they will do so elsewhere. That is pretty commonplace. It servers a purpose, kind of like a safety valve on a boiler. One thing I have seen work well is a "Dumpster" sub-forum. Instead of closing threads complaining about other forums, just automatically move them to the Dumpster. Does a thread have ad-hominem attacks? Move it to the Dumpster with the rest of the trash and let folks fight it out there. The effect of having posts moved to the Dumpster is usually that the nonsense stops almost immediately. Nobody whines or fights in a thread that is watched by only one other person. Trolls and most other online miscreants are attention whores.

Just because Phil doesnt allow XXX on his website means we should self sensor or moderate here

Who cares what Phil does or wants? If he tries to tell folks what they can do here, or anywhere outside his own forum, he can go jump off a bridge. Why not just ignore him, as one would a troll?

Another repulsive thing I see pop up from users here, applying standards from another site is the term "Gentlemanly".

"Gentlemanly? Gentlemanly. Gentlemanly gentlemanly. Gentlemanly gentlemanly gentlemanly. NO, GENTLMANLY!! What the gentlemanly? Gentlemanly you and the gentlemanly you rode in on!"

Yeah, that place is beyond weird. Maybe one magic brownie too many for some of them? Anyways, who cares?. If they want to act schizo, let them. And if someone says "gentlemanly" here, the world won't end. It might take a few days for folks to recover after escaping from the insane asylum.

And remember, there is no such thing as "freedom of speech" on private property. Some people do not understand the First Amendment and think that they can say whatever they want everyone. Wrong. The first amendment applies to the government suppression of speech of the public. It has NO bearing on private property. We need to all remember that at is a fundamental tenet behind forum rules.

That might be true, but there is such a thing as social norms, even on the Internet. Forum owners can do whatever they want on their own forums, but will be called out if they behave badly and break those unwritten rules.

If someone feels totally embittered about bad experiences on forums far off, perhaps it is time to turn off the computer, go outside, and enjoy the fresh air, Or at least sit by the fireplace and sip a wee bit of brandy.

Of course starting this thread would cause drama of some kind but I too

Nonsense. Its an observation on "process". It's not actual data. It's not actual drama, per se but a discussion on the process of creating drama

  If you want a shaving forum free of any attachment or bond there's DFS  and another really good new one ATG (Against the Grain.)

ALL forums take money in. A handful might start off with altruistic reasons but inevitably they end up taking in money. Successful ones get bought out by larger companies that run forums (e.g., Internet Brands). But sooner or later reality sets in and they take paying vendors.

DFS has paying vendors. You think those banner ads are free? You don't think http://www.atgshaving.com isn't getting paid for their banner ads? Do you think the ads all over their pages they just decided to give Amazon free advertising? Or Microsoft?

And their rules? They got 26 rules! Let that sink in. TWENTY SIX rules. Read rule #18 very carefully. Read it closely. Now go listen to Rick DeWise rant https://brushnsoapnblade.wordpress.com/2...-and-more/ start around 1:01. Its ALWAYS about money. Why do you think that rule exists? TL;DR ... because they want you to read their Ads (as Mr. DeWise notes).

If you find ANY Internet forum, any subject, that does not take in money for ads, post it. If the originator does it for purely altruistic reasons, they will get my vote as forum of the year. Such a place DID exist when forums were list servers but those days are long gone when list servers migrated to Groups run by places like Yahoo and were monetorized via ads in the hosting platforms.

 It's just a private advertisement for a store & internet business in Redondo Beach, CA. A circular and classified ad for that store. Nothing wrong with that at all. But it's not a shaving forum.

So what? Any generalized forum is a hosting platform for ads for ALL the companies they take ad revenue from. What's the difference?  Luxury Barber https://www.luxurybarber.com sells stuff, just like Bullgoose. They also have a forum http://community.luxurybarber.com. This is not different than Bullgoose.

Autogeek is a massive online store for car detailing products. http://www.autogeek.net Their forum is http://www.autogeekonline.net is a HUGE resources for auto detailing fans. Its a tremendous resource. You think the Bullgoose forum is unique in the Internet? Its common.

"Gentlemanly?  Gentlemanly.  Gentlemanly gentlemanly.  Gentlemanly gentlemanly gentlemanly.  NO, GENTLMANLY!!  What the gentlemanly?  Gentlemanly you and the gentlemanly you rode in on!"

I've come to hate the word "Gentleman". This isn't 1890 anymore. Get over it. If we are talking the same place, its just a logo, a catchphrase they jumped on. And anyone from 2016 understands its just a means to allow the members to "bond" over a catchphrase but in real life, is meaningless. Just watch how people drive and see if they are all "gentlemen".

I keep hearing people referring to ad revenue or other money making aspects of the forums. They say it like its a bad thing. Its not, something has to keep the lights on and pay the bills. The trick is to try to achieve a balance with an independent online forum that hosts numerous vendors rather than just promoting one. The ads should be for things that the members are interested in learning about or buying so, in reality they're providing a service. If the forum starts running unrelated advertising based merely on money for viewership then you might start losing members. If DFS for instance began running banners for prescription ED drugs or dating sites it would likely spur a response - some members may complain some may just go elsewhere.

The vendors who are active on DFS and who buy banners must think its worthwhile otherwise they wouldn't do it.